The one about My Big Fat Greek...Reception?

I did something on Sunday that I'd never done.

I was invited to a wedding, but only attended the reception. Somehow, to me, that seemed like cheating, like some sort of lie. Did I earn the right to attend the party if I didn't attend the ceremony? In fairness, the ceremony was in the Bronx and the party was in New Rochelle- not exactly within walking distance of each other. I was told that it was not uncommon to just attend the reception and that the bride, in fact, did not except us to attend the ceremony. I figured it must be something the goyim do. Jews would never do this. For pleasure, in this case food and drink, we must endure, which means sitting through some endless service.

Greek weddings are steeped in tradition. I think even more so that Jewish weddings. There was lots of folk dancing which went on for several hours. At one point the bride's mother pulled me into the dance circle, which I thought would be fun until I looked down and realized that there were actual steps involved rather than just randomly kicking and galloping in a circle. I faked it well enough. Old men danced together in the center of the room. I bet that they had grown up together. Could they have imagined when they were young in Greece that they would end up celebrating a wedding of one of their children decades later in Westchester New York?

This was an event steeped in ritual, in history. They spoke English and Greek. They sang Don't Cry for Me Argentina, which I thought was very strange. Members of the wedding party were assigned roles unfamiliar to me. Is this what it must be like for a non-Jew to stumble into a Jewish Wedding?

I was jealous of this close, large family. I don't have that. I haven't spoken to my cousins in years. I can't even remember the names of their children. I don't speak to my brothers nearly as often as I should. Our family just wasn't like that. I often wonder whether we have placed importance on things that aren't so important at the expense of forgetting things like family. I was reminded of this while I toasted my friend's joy. I thought of the people who, should I have a wedding, I would not be able to introduce, who I would not consider inviting for no other reason than the fact that I never thought it important to maintain those ties. Those people are strangers to me. I can never get that time back.

Oh, and a word of advice. Never, ever omit place cards from your wedding reception . Your guests will have no idea where to sit.