The one where I go all kinds of crazy over Project Runway

Project Runway is a new reality show on Bravo. It airs on Wednesday nights at 9pm and for those of you not watching, I suggest you start doing so immediately. The concept is simple. A search was done for the twelve top undiscovered fashion designers in the United States. These twelve people are brought to New York, given posh digs and studio space at Parsons. Every week they have a challenge and are judged by a panel including Michael Kors, who seems like such a bitter sad queen, Nina Garcia, who is the fashion director at Elle Magazine and is such a raving bitch she must be seen to be believed, a guest judge and host Heidi Klum, whose inability to grasp the English language is simply baffling. After the judging, someone is declared the winner, they get immunity in the next challenge, and someone is out. At the end, the final three contestants will each get a show during Fashion Week in NYC. The winner gets a spread in Elle Magazine, a mentorship with a Banana Republic design team and $100,000 to start their own line. The contestants include:

Daniel- He got voted out in the first episode where they had to make outfits from stuff you would buy in a grocery store. He tailored a jacket from butcher paper then binded the edges with tin foil and it looked like, well...butcher paper with foil on it. Plus, he was all new new agey and spouted this bullshit about "finding your bliss". Good riddance.

Mario- Mario was voted out in episode two where they had to use cotton jersey to create an outfit with the word ENVY as inspiration. Now, I liked Mario. He had a "fuck you" kind of attitude that I thought was cute. But, he was lazy and the judges called him on it. Bye Mario!

Starr- This basket case was voted out in week three where they had to design a holiday party dress for Banana Republic. Starr's outfit loooked like a chorus dress from a community theatre production of Chicago. When she got booted, she flipped out. Was it really that much of a surprise Starr?

Vanessa- Vanessa was great. She was British and a bit older than most of the others. Vanessa seemed to be very successful in her own right and her designs were great. But last week, they had to work on teams to create a rock and roll outfit. This was hard for Vanessa because it wasn't her design they were constructing and she isn't a good sewer. When the judges asked each contestant who should be out, Vanessa said her own name. How fucking stupid! So out she went.

Alexandra- Alexandra is from Florida. She's young and pretty and so boring. No wonder she doesn't get any time on camera.

Robert- Robert is a women's tailor. He's very good looking and completely goofy. The way he emphasizes words when he speaks is hysterical. I like Robert. He seems nice. But his work doesn't stand out and he won't make it to fashion week.

Nora- Nora has a mohawk. She's the youngest one there. She is certainly talented, but her inexperience manifests itself in her immature behavior. Last week, during the rock and roll challenge, Nora walked out of the studio in a huff while her team was on deadline and spent the rest of the time crying. I don't think Nora will be around much longer. She may be in the final five.

Austin- Austin Scarlett is the biggest queen I've ever seen. He makes me look like Tom Selleck. His background is in theatrical costume design and it shows. His work, while beautiful, isn't really realistic and while I think he has endeared himself to the viewers, he'll probably be the next to go.

Wendy- Wendy is the oldest contestant. She always talks about her strategy which is so stupid. There is no strategy on this show. The decisions are in the hands of the judges, not the contestants you asshole. After a rocky start, Wendy has shown that she is capable of good work, but I don't think it leaves much of an impression. Plus, I just don't like her.

Kevin- Fashion apparently is Kevin's family's business. So he is one of the more skilled competitors. He's also been listed on the show as being both 37 years old and 44. Hmmm. His designs are consistently lovely and last week he won (which was a bogus decision, but anyway). He'll be in the final 3.

Kara Saun- Kara Saun has designed clothes for some pretty famous people. She seems to be the most skilled technician of all of them and her designs are innovative and wearable. She's great. Everyone calls her Kara Saun when they refer to her which is weird. I mean, that's her first and last name. She'll be in the final 3 and she might win.

Jay- Jay is my favorite. I looove Jay. He's big and loud and smokes and wears huge sunglasses and Pucci print scarves on his head and mink stoles and...he's just great. Jay's style is punk rock, edgy fabulousness. He should have won the Banana Republic challenge and he should have won the rock and roll challenge. He didn't, but I predict he'll win the whole competition and that's all that really counts. Here's the link to his site http://www.jaymccarroll.com I don't like his men's clothes and the picture of the dude at the toilet is just weird.

I think the reason I love this show so much, aside from the fact that it's so fucking gay, is that the contestants on it have real skill. They can do something that a majority of the population can't and they do it really well. Also, Heidi Klum has her own catchphrases, like before the judging she always says "In fashion you're either in or you're out. Tonight one of you will be the winner. The other will be out." And after someone is booted, they have to shake Heidi's hand and she says "Aufwiedersein" (is that how you spell it??) For sheer camp value alone, it's priceless. Anyway, I've written way to much about this, plus, it's on tonight and it's the wedding dress challenge. Tune in, there will be a quiz tomorrow.